 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
 |
Psychiatric Psychiatrist - A Joke on Psychiatry
A few weeks ago I went to see a psychiatrist. We talked about how I was feeling. I really wanted to hit him in the face when he asked that. I didn´t do that. I regret that now. No, I replied politely and asked him if he thought I came there because he is such a nice guy, and the chairs are really comfortable. He didn´t say anything to that. He just smiled and I smiled back. I shouldn´t have done that Then he asked me if I did any kind of drugs. I asked him if he had any, and if he thought it would help if I took some. He didn´t think that was funny. But I did. Then he asked me what I thought the problem was. I told him my problem was that people asked too many questions. Then he asked me why. I gave up on everything at that point. I told him that. I shouldn´t have done that. He told me I had a depression. That made me depressed. Then he told me to take some pills and fill out a form. That confirmed the reason I went there. Life sucks. Then I went home and felt ackward. I decided to call a friend. My friend picked the phone up. I told him that the psychiatrist had told me I was depressed. I shouldn´t have done that. My friend asked me alot of questions. I answered his questions. Then he went neurotic on me, and treated me like a disease which needed to be cured. Then I told him to go fuck himself. I never talked to that friend again. He told my other friends. They told their friends who told their .. Nobody wants to talk to me now. I told my psychiatrist that last week. He told me that my depression was getting worse. Then he gave me some stronger pills, and alot of new forms to fill out. I shouldn´t have done that. I took the pills and filled out the forms. Then my psychiatrist put me in this psychiatric ward i´m in today. The walls are white, and the straps are tight. I like it here. They say i´m going to be here for a long time. I don´t mind. The nurses have nice tits, and they don´t ask questions. That´s what I did. ------------------------------------ This Article was brought to you by: ------------------------------------ The Worst Magazine On the Internet! Featuring Insane Jokes, Weird Humour, Bad News and Stupid Facts you did not really want to know. This is not a joke. Take it seriously, like a deep pranayama breath.."there is no magazine" Visit us at http://www.assiah.net
MORE RESOURCES:
Review: 'February House' is a fresh, humorous musical about 1940s commune with ... - Washington Post
Google News |
 |
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
25 Reasons You Might Need to Wear a Welding Helmet A welding helmet is a safety device worn for protection while one is welding; however, there are definitely many other uses for a welding helmet. A welding helmet is a very practical that should be found in every home. Cant Get There From Here Can't Get There From Here Juneau is the capital of Alaska, but did you know that you cannot drive there from anywhere? You can fly into Juneau or you can take a ferry to Juneau, but you can't actually drive there. There are no roads into Juneau. Discover the Lighter Side of the Internet We all know the Internet is a great tool for finding out information and sharing knowledge. But as a human sometimes sitting at a computer all day can get quite tedious, especially if it is your job 5 days a week. Humor Under The Keyboards For me, the piano is the symbol of what is stiff, proper and elegant. It doesn't have faults, it is perfect. Sweet Vengeance Purrfected I love animals but cats are my favorites. There's just something about them that makes me relate to them so easily. Poor Rixs Almanac 8-13-05 Dear Poor Rix: A guy just invited me to a football game. I do not understand this event. Essential Laughter Take time to laugh at yourself and the ridiculous in life. It is so refreshing to just laugh at your slips, peculiarities, forgetfulness, and fumbles. Valet Parking: Theft with Consent This column is long overdue. To put it in library terms, which I guess I already did (but I'd like to elaborate), this column is like checking out a book in 1998 but not returning it until yesterday. Wanted: Treadmill for an Elephant Maggie, the 22 year-old African elephant, has been a resident of the Alaska Zoo since 1983. The Zoo recently decided that Maggie needs nicer quarters, more attention, and a treadmill. Slip-sliding On A Peel Every day, or at least every other day, we make a fruit smoothie at mid morning. Almost without fail, these smoothies contain bananas; so, we go through about 10 or 12 bananas a week. If, An Online Marketers Internet Addiction Poem, Can You Relate to This? IF, An Online Internet Marketing PoemIf before you have turned on the coffee, or got your kids fed, If you are the last one dressed and ready to leave the house, While others in the family get ready, your still moving a mouse.If you have more friends online, than you do in real life, And hubby refers to you as his cyber wife. Voodoo Munchies Looking for a lighthearted and fun way to remove the negative energy of a certain disruptive person from your life, or from your mind, if the person in question has moved on? Consider the cleansing (and giggle-inspiring) effect of Voodoo Munchies. Beginning now, whenever you need to deal with this person or the dirty bathtub ring of negative vibes they left in your head, bake a cake or a cookie (depending on your eating habits and kitchen skills) and decorate it with this person's name and or likeness. Cloning Advantage Super Families As the cloning debate of humankind continues we find ourselves in an interesting predicament. We see the need of self to extend past one's own lifetime as an innate characteristic; self-preservation has always been one of mankind's greatest drivers of motivation. Your Stars Part 3 LibraHit TV show 'The X Factor' is back on our screens giving us all a rare, legitimate chance to laugh at the mentally ill during the audition stages. In this PC berserk world we now live in, such an activity has become scandalously frowned upon so it's only right to thank ITV for reviving this tragically forgotten pleasure by switching on in your droves. American Independence - The True Story It was late in 1775, and King George III was at Buckingham Palace, sitting in reflective mood on his commode. His 13 year old son Prince George (yes, they were very imaginative with their names, those royal types), was sitting on the floor nearby, otherwise occupied with the 18th century equivalent of Game Boy: a model soldier with a rifle sat on a model elephant, shooting at a model tiger two planks of wood away. Computers According to Carol A is for Anti-Virus: she got it from my Uncle.B is for Backup: always look in your rear view mirror first. Mexican Spaminator When we decided to move to Mexico, one of the most exciting things that popped into my mind was that I would get a new Internet Service Provider and finally get off the 300,000,000 Spam lists that I was on. I thought for sure I would go insane if I received one more "How to Enlarge Your Manhood" piece of Spam-as if I needed to do that anyway (yeah right). How To Marry A Wealthy Guy How To Marry A Wealthy Guy(or Girl.. Local Author Joins History and Humor To Tell His Stories Joseph Yakel was born and raised in New York's Capital region, and calls this place home. His travels have taken him far and wide, but it's his hometown surroundings that serve as a backdrop for his writing. A French Teachers Memories: First Day at School Despite my diplomas that allowed me to teach in state secondary schools, and my requests, I had been appointed to teach to a sixth-grade class. At least, I almost worked in my backyard.
|
|
|
 |
 |
